This 2024 book by Peter McIndoe and Conner Gaydos is subtitled “The True Story of Mass Avian Murder and the Largest Surveillance Campaign in US History.”

Nothing makes me giggle more than seeing some dude holding up a “Birds Aren’t Real” sign at nearly every protest and sporting event. It tickles me even more than the “John 3:16” nutters. So when I found this book on the closeout rack at Barnes & Noble, I couldn’t resist buying it.

Have you ever watched a comedian who has a very finely constructed long joke that you really appreciate? At the payoff you think “wow that was really nicely done.” You can see where they’re coming from, and they obviously spent a lot of work refining it. You really appreciate the bit, but, what you don’t do, is laugh. That’s pretty much what this book was for me.

As I learned by studying at the Second City, good satire doesn’t overly rely on a wink-wink-nudge-nudge. Which this book leans into too heavily. Also, as I learned from Discordianism, not being able to tell if it’s meant as a joke is key to a good psychosocial-conspiracy.

For me, the authors made a terrible mistake in the early pages. A key moment in their historical timeline relies on events that occur at a Waffle House in Boise, Idaho.

But there is no Waffle House in Boise, Idaho. You see, as a magician, I am careful to avoid asserting evidence that can be easily, and concretely, refuted. If they had written “a waffle house,” that would not have blown apart my suspension of disbelief. How unfortunate.

That aside, there are many fun and compelling things about the book:

• The discussion of a hummingbird drone and the JFK assassination
• The description of online research as “YouTube videos of men yelling at their phones inside of trucks”
• The revelation that bird poop is a synthetic tracking liquid applied by drone birds to help surveil people
• The reason that ”birds” perch on power lines is to recharge their batteries. This is also the secret reason why many communities have not replaced overhead lines with safer, more reliable underground power.

My hat’s off to the authors, and overall this book is a fine accomplishment. I have been spoiled by the tighter, funnier, and more convincing shaggy dog tales proffered by the Discordians, and even the Church of the SubGenius. If you’d like to learn more about the Bird Truthers movement, pick up a copy at Amazon. However, if you want a real mindfck, go for The Illuminatus Trilogy instead.

23 Skidoo!

In The Home as a Place of Production, Karen Rosenkranz asks: “So what would an alternative vision for the home of the future look like?”

I think some clues are to be found in the past. In the pre-industrial era, the domestic dwelling was where most work took place. From shoemakers to blacksmiths or scholars, skilled workers made things out of their homes. Food was produced within or around the house. This was all part of life – making, mending and feeding oneself. The duality of life and work hadn’t been established yet.

via Dense Discovery

Today, I wasted a good half-hour of my life trying to find refill tape for my Brother P-Touch “Home and Hobby II” PT-85 Label Printer (catchy name). I have the old, empty cartridge and it clearly reads “M-K231 12mm 1/2”. Do you think that I can find a new one to buy? Nope. The Brother website literally has zero results for any combination of those words, and it is their product! A search on Amazon returns an overwhelming list of results, none of which are Brother-brand products, and none of which have the same part number or size.

Some third-party tapes are close. They have variants that are similar to M-K231, and they are nearly the same size (0.47”), but not a one of them is an exact match for what I need.

I’m guessing that Brother has stopped making this size tape (all their part numbers start with TZe), which isn’t surprising given that the label machine is easily 20 years old. What is surprising to me is that the no-name replacements sold on Amazon can’t be bothered to make it clear that they are compatible with the actual Brother part number.

Despite middling reviews related to adhesiveness, I ordered one of the knock-off label cartridge from Amazon. My irritation at how hard it was to find is exceeded only by my anxiety that what I receive will work or be any good. Stay tuned.

Update: The replacement tapes have arrived and they are physically identical to the Brother cartridge, but are labeled slightly differently than described on Amazon, and still different from the Brother cartridge. Reviews on the site mention that the labels are hard to peel, but the ones I received a split-back, so go figure. The cartridge does work just find, and the adhesive seems fine, although to my eye the black print isn’t as dark as it is with the Brother cartridge.

This is the third book I’ve read in the series of novels by Marilyn Ross that are based on the Dark Shadows TV show. However, there are a few books between this one and the others I’ve read, and the gap might explain some of the changes that I encountered.

The setting of the book is 1968. (It was published in 1969.) The other books aren’t specific about their time.

In this book, the house is now known as “Collinwood,” which is almost certainly an attempt to match the television show, even though tho these books are not part of that universe.

No spoilers, but in this book Barnabas is living in a pub room (not in the Old House), and the story features a Spiritualist Medium which really adds a nice occult element. We also learn that Barnabas can only feed on females, which justifies the many romances interweaving through the series.

This time, I didn’t notice any Hitchockian references to “dark shadows” in the story, but I am beginning to think that a drinking game based on the author using “wan” would be killer.

You can find a copy of this book at Amazon, of course, but wouldn’t it be more fun to let fate decide if you’re fortunate enough to encounter it in a used bookstore?

Writing for the once-great Chicago Sun Times, the fabulous columnist Neil Steinberg discovers what techies have known for years: Google can pull the plug at any time

This is very much a cautionary tale, and the lesson is that writers need to own their words. Sure, if someone is paying you for “content,” you don’t own that instantiation (pardon the programmer-speak), but you do morally own the product of your labor. Save it. Keep a plain text backup of every. single. thing. you. write. Always, and forever. I accomplish this in two ways: First off, I compose anything I intend to publish in Ulysses, so there’s a copy inside that app’s library. Secondly, I publish using MarsEdit, which also keeps a copy of what’s pushed to the website. That’s two back-ups, so to speak, built into my workflow. I don’t even have to think about it, as long as I follow my process.

For other things that I write — notes, email drafts, etc. — I do all that using Drafts. This app also has an automatic library of documents where I can find anything unfinished over the last few years. Again, it happens automatically, so long as I follow my self-imposed process of always using either Drafts or Ulysses, and nothing else.

On a related note, if you’re running your own site, WordPress, Ghost, and the ilk, are quick and easy, but have no longevity. For the technical among you, read, savor, and follow this: This Page is Designed to Last: A Manifesto for Preserving Content on the Web

The irony that you’re reading this on a TypePad-hosted website is not lost on me. I’ve been publishing here for over 20 years, so there is a lot of inertia against leaving the platform. TypePad is very much a zombie service, and they haven’t been accepting new customers for years now. I’m grateful the owners keep it running (sort of), but there’s no doubt that someday I’ll have to move. But when that pain-in-the-ass day comes, I won’t lose any of my words.